Scene: Bar. Two people with beers wait to play darts.
A: How’s work?
B: Almost done with this paper I’m working on, but I can’t come up with a non-sucky title. You?
A: Oh I submitted something two days ago, taking it easy until the next things starts up…
B: Good good Distracted not really paying attention.
A: …But I do have another cool one coming up you may be interested in…
B: Uh huh, nice.
A: …About space monkeys that should win me a Nobel?
B: Oh sorry, I’ve just been really freaking out about how to title this paper. I know I should be able to figure it out, but I need this for my grant renewal, and you know they only read the titles…
A: You know that’s right.
B: But mainly I’m just sick of thinking about it. I just want this one to be done so I don’t have to think about it anymore.
A: Hey listen, I’ve got an idea that’ll help. Just take the next thing you overhear, and make that the title.
B: No way, I’m not crazy, it’ll probably be something like, “No way! You thought I was a hooker?!” I can’t risk that.
A: Then we’ll make it interesting. Loser of darts has to title their next paper with the first thing overheard.
B: Like the penguin thing?
A: Like the penguin thing.
They play darts. B loses.
A: Laughing You almost had me there! That means you get the next round — again! I’m going to get something good this time. Let’s see…
C: To the bartender Sooo,
A Elbows B and points to C.
C: What’s on tap?
Composed May 15, 2013.
Inspiration: What is on Tap? The Role of Spin in Compact Objects and Relativistic Jets